Archive for vikaren

THE COOP OF CTHULHU – Five Horror Films That Feature Chickens!

Posted in horror, movies, Trailer with tags , , , , , on July 28, 2009 by goregirl

a chickenIf you read the blog yesterday, then you already know I watched ‘Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead’. It was a weekend full of poultry! I ran into a girl from work who told me her husband started building a chicken coop in their backyard so they can keep two chickens. This may be a normal conversation in some people’s worlds, but everyone I know pretty much lives in the city, and keeping chickens isn’t exactly common. On the way home we passed by a sex shop that had an inflatable chicken in the window. Okay, sheep I kinda get, but chickens? sheep are docile and woolly while chickens are pretty active and have sharp pecky beaks. Are chickens sexy? Gonzo on the Muppet Show seemed quite fond of them. Maybe there’s some group of Gonzo worshippers out there that fantasize about chicken sex. It’s been a while since I posted anything other than a review so I figured it was time I compiled a list. And that is how ‘THE COOP OF CTHULHU – Five Horror Films That Feature Chickens’ was hatched. I combed my brain for horror films that feature chickens and this was all I could come up with. I’m sure I must be missing some voodoo, satan worship films. If you’ve got one, leave me a comment!

still from the substituteTHE SUBSTITUTE
Directed By: Ole Bornedal
The poor chickens are just snacks in this one. An alien possesses a farmers wife and goes to work as a 6th Grade substitute teacher. In one scene she is caught chowing down on a chicken, feathers and all in a room full of feathered friends.

still from angel heartANGEL HEART
Directed By: Alan Parker
“It will scare you to your very soul.”
This is the film that Cosby kid, Lisa Bonet lost favor with Bill over. Unfortunately her chicken co-star is nothing more than a sacrifice during a fevered ritualistic dance, but he probably got more press than any other chicken on this list.

food of the godsTHE FOOD OF THE GODS
Directed By: Bert I. Gordon
“One Taste Is All It Takes!”
Filmed right here in British Columbia on beautiful Bowen Island. Those giant animals they have over there are a real menace! Giant wasps, giant rats and best of all, giant chickens. Finally, the chickens get their revenge! ‘Food of The Gods’ is genuine Grade B Canadian cheese.

ZOMBEAK
Director: Sam Drog
“Murder Most Fowl!”
I read a review of Zombeak on http://www.dreadcentral.com. It’s a low budget independent film about rednecks, satanists, possessed chickens and the walking dead. That is a whole lotta movie! Sounds great! So I went to their official site at http://www.zombeak.com and watched the trailer. It looks like it could be an entertaining way to spend 70 minutes. So, even though I have never seen the film I had to include it. Who will survive the terror of Zombeak!?

still from poultrygeistPOULTRYGEIST: NIGHT OF THE CHICKEN DEAD
Director: Lloyd Kaufman
“Humans… the other white meat… Unless you’re black, then it’s dark meat… Or if you are Asian, then it’s yellow meat…Or if you are Native American, it’s red meat…”
It’s a horror-comedy-musical from Troma about zombie chickens. Go read yesterday’s review!

THE SUBSTITUTE (VIKAREN) – The Dungeon Review!

Posted in Denmark, horror, movies with tags , , , , on March 28, 2009 by goregirl

the-substitute-promo-posterThe films opening scene explains that aliens know only war. Their goal is to learn about and understand the human emotion of love. In attempt to do just that, they send a sphere that lands
on a deserted chicken farm. They take over the body of a farmers wife who reports to work as a grade six school teacher. Paprika Steen who plays the teacher is fantastic. She plays the wickedly nasty teacher with over the top ethusiasm and absolutely nails it. It is one of the most amusing and entertaining characters I have seen in a horror film in some time. The kids figure out almost immediately that there is something not quite right about their new teacher. She taunts and humilates the children with insults and appears to have the answer to every question. The more they learn about their new teacher the more horrified they become. The first half of this film is rock solid. A real masterpiece. Unfortunately the films conclusion is a complete and utter crapout. The ending seemed hurried and the finale was anti-climatic to say the least. It is intended to be more amusing than horrifying but it would have been appropriate to add a little more suspense, particularily for the final scene. There is no gore in this film and no scares at all. There are only a few isolated moments of suspense. This being said this film is still extremely watchable and I think that people who aren’t generally fans of the horror genre will also enjoy it. More “PG” than our regular fair but some really good clean fun! Definitely watch with the subtitles on! The dubbed version is unforgiveably bad! This 2007 Danish film is worth your rental dollar.

Dungeon Review: 3.5/5

Directed By: Ole Bornedal

Starring: Paprika Steen, Ulrich Thomsen, Jonas Wandschneider, Nikolaj Falkenberg-Klok, Emma Juel Justesen, Mollie Maria Gilmartin, Josephine Gents, Emma Claudia Søndergaard, Jakob Fals Nygaard, Andreas Gram Nielsen, Mathias Peter Kjær and Sonja Richter
paprika-steen-in-the-substitute