20 Possible Reasons There Won’t Be a New Post on Monday

1. Three day bender.

2. Going to a cabin in the woods.

3. My dog ate it.

4. I am attending my Highschool Reunion.

5. Introduction to taxidermy course.

6. I am at Sleepaway Camp.

7. Three day origami workshop.

8. Cave Diving.

9. Hiding from a psychotic ex-lover.

10. Attending an exorcism.

11. Knitting a bikini.

12. I am in jail.

13. Attacked by a werewolf.

14. Closing real estate deal for Transylvanian Count.

15. Investigating what happened to Solange.

16. Plastic surgery.

17. Amity Island Boating trip.

18. Making sacrifice to Satan.

19. Helping Ed Gein wallpaper his new place.

20.
Reinstating my title as The Filthiest Person Alive

16 Responses to “20 Possible Reasons There Won’t Be a New Post on Monday”

  1. 21. Looked in the basement.

    • goregirl Says:

      Couldn’t help myself. I guess I should have called this 20 possible reasons there won’t be a post Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday…

  2. 22. Going Antique hunting for ancient book of dark spells….. )love your list….:)

  3. 23. Devil Times Six.

  4. Hilarious. I’m secretly hoping for #5 and it’s taught by the guy from Taxidermia.

  5. 3 day bender followed by 2 days hangover, so that gives you a couple of extra days 🙂

    And if you did your bender well enough you can combine it with #12…

  6. 26. Stayed up too late looking for flying saucers.

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